#WeekendCoffeeShare: Dealing with Struggle

Happy Saturday!

If we were having coffee I’d tell you that a fellow blogger inspired me to find my #WeekendCoffeeShare image and create a post about some personal struggles.

We all have them and it’s helpful to talk with a trusted friend. Or, for our purposes here, to write it out (WIO), which is kind’ve the same thing!

Struggles come in a variety of shapes and sizes. They impact our lives in assorted ways. Sometimes it’s a small annoyance, but other times it can be life-altering.

Fortunately, my life is calm right now. My struggles are minor. But, it wasn’t always that way.

I spent two decades in a toxic marriage. My spouse was a verbally and emotionally abusive alcoholic. Addiction is progressive and grows worse over time. Life became a daily struggle to survive. I eventually found the courage to divorce him and move on.

It took an additional eight years to develop true self-esteem and confidence.

During that time I went back to school and earned the degree I’d always wanted. I left a dead end job and spread my wings in other areas, as well.

Eventually, the realization dawned on me: the only chains we wear in life are those we self-impose or allow others to place on us.

It was a hard lesson that required a lot of blood, sweat, and tears. But, the freedom and sense of self that I gained in the process were well worth the fight.

My struggles today are more benign. I want to tackle some projects that I’ve been putting off. It’s time to commit to eating healthy and exercising more regularly. Writing must be a priority again. All the usual stuff going into the new year.

However, in creating my To-Do list for 2020 I’m going to remind myself of all that I achieved in the past year: I reestablished a connection with an old friend, strengthened the bonds with those closest to me, took my first trip to Europe, and finished renovations in two bedrooms. I also welcomed my first grandchild!

As we attempt to work through our struggles, it’s important to celebrate our accomplishments. We must raise our level of self-awareness and live more intentionally. Reminding ourselves of our inherent value should be a daily meditation.

Looking ahead is important, but so is looking back. As human beings, our histories contain both failures and victories. Having the courage to acknowledge weakness is crucial for growth. And learning the lessons offered by of those experiences are solid building blocks for a brighter future!


Know Why “Rememberlutions” Are Better Than Resolutions?

Rememberlutions jar

Photo credit: Buzzfeed/Lauren Zaser

I’m reposting this with a few updates. It’s a practical & crafty alternative to a journal! 


What is it about resolutions that make us uncomfortable?

Is it because resolutions speak to the things that we don’t like about ourselves? Maybe our ideal weight has gotten farther out of reach or one pack of cigarettes isn’t getting us through the day. Maybe we’re nearing the five-year anniversary at a low-paying job that was supposed to be temporary while we searched for something better. Whatever the case might be it usually involves change. And change is never easy.

Maybe it’s because we’ve attempted resolutions in the past, only to fail after a few  weeks or months. The “let’s make a fresh start” enthusiasm of the New Year, enhanced by the herd mentality and lots of confetti, quickly grows stale when the party ends and we struggle at home alone.

“Remeberlutions” are a positive alternative to resolutions. It’s good to set goals, but the focus is on the small accomplishments that lead to a larger objective, as they happen. When a target is reached or something special occurs, we write it down and deposit the paper in a jar. At the end of the year, we read and celebrate all the wonderful things that happened.

Decorating the jar is a fun way to add inspiration to the project. I found this idea in an older Buzzfeed article from 2014. For ideas on how to decorate your jar from the original article click here.


We should always strive to improve our lives whenever we can. The end of the old year is a good time to assess what work needs to be done. The beginning of a new year is a good time to start that work and a Rememberlutions jar is a fun way to record the journey!


Whatever your objectives are for 2019 I wish you the best of luck & don’t forget to give yourself credit for all your accomplishments, both great & small!