2016 Kindness Challenge – Week 3

May 31, 2016 / Luanne Shernisky / 7 Comments

As we moved through week 3 of the Kindness Challenge our goal was to radiate kindness. This is easy to do when things are going smoothly and just the way we want. Smiles and a happy outlook are effortless under ideal conditions.

But, how about when everything goes wrong? You know…those days when we wish we had stayed in bed. It feels like a dark cloud is hanging over our heads and nothing is working out the way we hoped.

At these times the only thing we radiate is anger or frustration. Some of that is directed outward at other people and circumstances beyond our control. The weather, the unexpected traffic jam, the cranky boss. These types of issues can certainly put a damper on our plans and/or spirits.

This irritation is made worse if we start to blame ourselves:

“I should’ve been prepared for the change in weather.”

“I could’ve left earlier to allow for a possible traffic delay.”

” I would’ve worked harder on the last project, if only the boss were more appreciative.”

Should’ve, could’ve and would’ve.

If we make it a habit to constantly criticize ourselves when the going gets tough, we sure won’t be tolerant of others. During Week #1 we were asked to focus on self-kindness. Directing kindness internally must be an everyday practice if we want to show it outwardly.

I used to be quite hard on myself, largely due to the circumstances that I lived under. I blamed myself when things didn’t go right, convinced that I could’ve made a difference if only I were smarter, faster, tougher, etc. Certainly, there were times when I dropped the ball (like most human beings), but I was taking responsibility for things that were out of my control. Eventually, I left a bad situation and began to educate myself about the importance of self-compassion.

As I began to treat myself with love and patience, I was able to accept my humanity. Being human means occasionally making mistakes and I learned to be okay with that. I also noticed that I was more tolerant of others. Things that used to upset me no longer had the negative effects that they once had.

This past week one of my children made a snarky comment and I was able to let it roll right off. My response was a smile and a good-natured, “Oh, no that’s not what I meant…” and I explained in further detail my point. Ten minutes later I got an apology.

It’s so empowering to be more in control of my own emotions. How great if feels when someone is mean-spirited and I’m able to say to myself, “Something else is bothering them” or “They’re limited emotionally when it comes to this subject.”

Oftentimes, answering anger with understanding can diffuse a tense situation. It’s important to remember that anger is a mask for sadness.

We must let go of the need to be perfect. Recognizing our own humanity and giving ourselves an occasional pass when we make a mistake or use poor judgement allows us to do the same for those around us. Our kind energy is contagious and that’s definitely something worth “catching.”

Weekly Photo Challenge: Spare

May 30, 2016May 30, 2016 / Luanne Shernisky / 9 Comments

Spare

Verb (used with object) – to give or lend, as from a supply, especially without inconvenience or loss: Can you spare a cup of sugar? Can you spare me a dollar till payday?

“Can you spare some change?”

Naked Cowboy.png

If you’ve ever been to New York City (or other large urban areas) you’ve probably heard this question before. Panhandlers are common sights on the streets. Sometimes they sit silently with a collection can and a sign imploring passersby for donations. Others stand in the intersections, holding small bouquets of flowers to sell to passing motorists. There’s even a fellow known as the Naked Cowboy, who hangs out in Times Square. Dressed only in a cowboy hat, boots, and his skivvies, he strums a guitar throughout the evening hours. For a small contribution you can take a picture with him. I snapped this photo in 2011, so I’m not sure if he’s still there or went on to bigger and better things…

We came across the gentleman pictured above (main photo) in the subway during our trip to NYC. He sat quietly, fashioning soda pop cans into artwork. They really were artistic and looked like some serious skill and patience were needed to create them. They were for sale, for whatever amount you could spare, and he had a large can for prospective buyers to place their money in. We made a small donation without taking any of the soda can art, since a walking tour doesn’t allow for much extra baggage.

Soda Cans I don’t remember if his cans had a specific function other than a decorative purpose. I found a picture on the Internet of a similar project that turns cans into hanging ornaments.

I was impressed not only with his creations, but with his initiative and entrepreneurial spirit. He could be like many of the others and sit with a sign and a can, but he found a way to earn some money and recycle at the same time!

Adjective – kept in reserve, as for possible use: a spare part.

If you’ve ever walked the streets of NYC on garbage night, you’d be amazed. The number of bags piled up curbside for pickup is like nothing this small town girl had ever seen. Knowing that so much of it is going into landfills, it’s refreshing that this gentleman is doing his part to recycle these spare aluminum cans; something that is easy to find in most trash barrels along the street.

Noun – a spare thing, part, etc., as an extra tire for emergency use.

The man selling the soda can art doesn’t have to spend money to make money. His materials are spares and readily available (one man’s trash is another man’s treasure!) They only have to be washed and dried before being fashioned into the artwork we see above.

His resourcefulness and efforts to repurpose the aluminum cans are what prompted me to take this picture. I’m glad I did, as it illustrates the various meanings of the word spare, this week’s photo challenge.

Weekly Photo Challenge: Spare