In an effort to get back into writing on a regular schedule, I joined the Blogging from A to Z April Challenge. This is the first time I’ve participated and hope to succeed with posting each day, as my blog has grown dormant.
My theme is “A Vocabulary for Intentional Living.” This corresponds with the objective of my blog, which sees life as a voyage shaped by circumstances both within and outside of our control. Realizing our purpose and goals begins with self-awareness and mindfulness in all our daily choices.
Forgiveness is a wonderful, yet unnerving process that forces us to examine ourselves and expose our vulnerabilities. Whether we’re receiving it, giving it to other people, or offering it to ourselves, it is an intended act which benefits the relationships involved. Whenever we become more self-aware and generous toward ourselves and others we are choosing to live with intention.
Forgiveness FOR others
Being on the receiving end of an apology is easier than having to make one. We should be grateful, not smug, when the offending party recognizes their missteps and seeks to repair any damage to the friendship. It takes strength of character to admit you’re wrong.
Just ask someone who endured continued “mistakes” without ever hearing a mea culpa. Obviously, mistakes that happen over and over form a pattern of abuse. We tend to think of abuse as physical or sexual mistreatment, but it comes in all shapes and sizes. It can be verbal, emotional, and financial. People who take advantage of others, in any way, are abusive.
Finding peace means breaking ties with toxic people who will never be sorry for their bad behavior. However, we must forgive them anyway. It’s not about them and excusing their behavior or transgression. It’s about you and the ability to move on. Surrounding yourself with a like-minded tribe of family and friends is an important step in living with intention.
Life becomes easier when you learn to accept an apology you never got. ~Robert Brault
Forgiveness FROM others
Good relationships are made up of mutual respect and trust. When WE hurt others through word or deed, we undermine that trust and risk losing them.
Admitting mistakes takes courage and honesty. No one likes to accept responsibility for behaving badly, but it’s essential to successful relationships. And it helps us grow as a person. Taking time to do a self-examination into what motivates our emotions, etc. helps us modify unhealthy behaviors.
Without forgiveness life is governed by… an endless cycle of resentment and retaliation. ~Roberto Assagioli
Forgiveness for OURSELVES
Forgiveness doesn’t always involve another person. Sometimes the process has only to do with ourselves.
We all have regrets. They may be things that occurred recently or decades ago. They may involve specific people and situations or be more general; a way that we acted or reacted to a life event.
Whatever the case may be, we must recognize our humanity and the fact that we’re imperfect. Certainly, it’s important to make amends with anyone we’ve offended first. If we harbor any anger towards ourselves it’s crucial to make amends with ourselves.
We should always try to improve how we communicate. Loving others and forgiving is possible when we show ourselves the same compassion. This will open up opportunities for positive growth as we go forward.
Forgiveness does not change the past, but it does enlarge the future. ~Paul Boese